[xkappax]

Hi. I am new to these boards, but I have a very serious issue involving my two cats, Ghost and Shady.

My elderly cat Otis just passed away about two months ago, and we brought a new cat into the house, Ghost. Ghost is a white half siamese cat who is a year old. He is completely deaf.

My older cat Shady is SCARED TO DEATH of him. It's been two months and there's been little or not progress between the two of them. We've followed nearly every internet guide on how to introduce two cats, and I'm starting to think that I'm going to have to give up Ghost. I've grown so attached to him that it would absolutely break my heart.

I have tried many things to introduce them together, and the thing that probably works the best is to have Ghost in a pet carrier and let Shady the older cat eat in front of him. Shady seems very comfortable this way. The moment I open the pet carrier, Ghost darts at Shady and Shady runs. They begin rolling around and Shady begins to growl and make some of the most horrible noises I've ever heard. Today he almost got his eye bitten .

The biggest factor here is that Ghost is deaf and not reading Shady's body language, and he cannot hear the horrible noises that are coming out of Shady. Ghost is just completely nonplussed by anything.

If anyone can help me, it would be greatly appreciated. These are two wonderful cats, and i really want to do the right thing here. It seems I keep making mistakes.

Thanks in advance.

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[CatsRU]

Have you tried Feliways and Rescue Remedy? You could also seek your vet's advice as to something like Prozac.

[Randiocoy]

how long do you let them out together? or when they roll around do you break them up right away?

I am DEFINITLEY NOT AN EXPERT, but when I got my second cat...i eventually had someone come over because they were rolling around attacking each other. When this person came over she watched them and let them work it out. when it got too rough she would have me spray them apart and they would instantly go back at it. She said it was not true fighting and they were more playing and figuring out who was dominant. It was very stressful and it was hours on end watching them and there were a lot of growls coming from my first cat. after the first day i found them snoozing together and then when they woke they were back at it. If you know someone experienced with cats maybe they could come over and help you analyze them. Because it may not be actually fighting. to this day (over a year later) they sometimes play fight and Daisy still makes growling noises, but they are BEST FRIENDS. The lady from the vets office said that when cats are really fighting it is very loud and fur flies and it is vicious. If they are just doing a lot of rolling around tackling each other and making growling noises they are just figuring each other out and where they stand. i was worried sick when all this was happening, but it was only a matter of days and they were snuggling. and the tackling play fighting toned down less and less. like i said they still sometimes do this. The cat that I am currently introducing they do not tackle him at all he doesnt have to make a sound and the other 2 know not to come to close. Like they sense his energy and they will go up to him and get a good sniff if they sense he is in a more trusting mood. I doubt that him being def would enable him to know the other ones energy. when they play fight they do bite but it is never too hard and NEVER has broke skin. Try contacting someone that could drop and give some advice.

like i said i am no expert but this was my experience.

[Miss Bronte]

I suspect that too often, time can be a factor.....as an example, I've just spent 3 months slowly introducing my foster failure kitten to the resident girls who are very close, being mother/daughter. Being young and silly, even once they all started playing and interacting, he thought it was HILARIOUS to jump on the head of another cat It still happens but rarely - I find the best thing to do is feed lovely treats to the resident cats and PLAY with the new youngster. Younger cats cannot resist the temptation of a fabulous toy and I play and play with him until he lies down exhausted on the cold slate tiles Then he has no energy with which to behave like the little ratbag he is!

With a deaf kitty it can be difficult - distract him with toys, touch him to keep his focus on YOU and give him treats when he looks to you. The problem is that Shady is a complete novelty to your youngster. I would also consider purchasing a mosquito tent with a solid floor (quite cheap) - I use one of these for my foster kittens until they learn to toilet properly. You could use this to contain both Ghost and Shady alternately - not together - so that Ghost can sniff and be silly without being threatening. I think noise is important when they play or fight. Sometimes the girls will play together very silently and suddenly one will step over "the line" and some hissing and growling occurs. Same with the new foster.

Finally, supervise, supervise, supervise. As difficult as it is for you, it is better for the cats to be apart and come together for an hour a day and have good experiences than anything else. In fact, when I started introducing Dizzy it was about 5 mins per day with each cat at an absolute maximum! Brontë sat on her favourite chair getting loads of chicken and Dizzy was on the ground playing with shoelaces - perfect!!!

Good luck

[debalvers]

If Shady will eat in front of the cage while Ghost stares at him, and even if they fight, I think it's far from hopeless. I think the problem with having Ghost in the carrier is there's nowhere for him to go except out, and if Shady is right outside he's the perfect target. Fighting in some ways is better than Shady just running and hiding, which is what mine tend to do - denial is not progress.

With mine I have generally confined the younger cat to a small area of territory such as a room, and limited their interaction. I've used flyscreen or glass so that the older cat can see the younger cat but feel safe. Initially the older cat usually won't even watch, he'll just run away, but if the younger cat is distracted by food or another human, generally they will watch with interest. It seems to me you need a way for Ghost and Shady to be in either adjoining areas where they can observe each other without interation, and then progress to having them in the same area, but where Shady can retreat safely. Bronte's example of being treated on the chair with the new cat safely below sounds like the sort of thing to aim for. Making the old cat higher and safe and being given a treat is all good reinforcement for Shady's confidence that you still love him - if he's like my cats, he's horribly jealous, and that's partly what the fighting is about.

If you have more than one human in the house, particularly now you have a siamese, it is good if the old cat is spoiled and given lots of attention by one person, and the siamese by another, since they tend to attach themselves to individuals rather than the household as a whole. If they have to share you, then they both need special time with you, and Shady should get more privileges and space in the house. This is hard with a young cat because they need lots of attention, but if you can wear Ghost out and then say feed the two cats near each other between a door or screen, they should hopefully get a little used to sharing space without conflict. I have used food a lot because they can't eat and chase at once, and if Shady gets rewards for tolerating Ghost nearby, that gives him a positive association with the new cat. I expect to go through a lot of yoghurt shortly

I've also tried Feliway and Rescue Remedy, both of which I think help (me, at least), and the towel trick, where you rub both cats with the same towel so they smell each other on them (there's supposed to be an order you do this in which I can never remember). I know it feels endless but eventually they do sort it out (she says, crossing her fingers for next time...).

[Patricia L]

I think two months is still early days yet.
My two were just starting to get on after 2 months, now at 10 weeks they are just starting to play together and are doing a little mutual grooming. Both were used to living with other cats, However I kept mine totally separate for 1 month and then only supervised visits, if things looked like deteriorating then I separated them again, I never once let them fight.

[xkappax]

wow, thank you all for your responses so far. I feel like I'm finally getting somewhere with this. Thanks for making me feel that it is not hopeless. I will send my husband the link for this thread as well, so he can have a look.

As far as the feliway goes? or rescue remedy? how long does it take for those things to work? I have the feliway spray... should I get the diffuser instead?

I haven't a clue how to use the rescue remedy, and the instructions on the package don't say how long I should use it before I expect to see results.

thanks again for the prompt responses. You've given me new hope. Any more advice is definitely welcome and appreciated.

[CatsRU]

With rescue remedy, you put about five drops in the drinking water and you can also rub it behind the ears.

A feliway diffuser is a good idea rather than the spray in my opinion.

[xkappax]

I think I am going to go pick up a diffuser tonight.

This is what we tried this evening.

We brought Shady downstairs and let him eat. He did fine. We brought ghost in in the pet carrier. Shady did fine still. We opened up the pet carrier and let Ghost eat, and shady got scared and ran away. I brought Shady back downstairs, and he let m e and started to eat, but the moment he saw Ghost, he ran away.

I still am starting to feel it's hopeless, but I'll try anything.

[Miss Bronte]

Hi again

Ok - you are putting way too much pressure on Shady by repeatedly bringing him back when he is frightened. Shady is attempting to cope with the situation by hiding from what he is scared of. Rather than feeding Shady in front of the cage, put him up on a chair or high scratching post so he is ABOVE what he is afraid of and don't let Ghost harass him. You are also moving too fast - you need to have Shady feeding next to Ghost's cage for a WEEK not 5 mins before you take the next step. I wouldn't let Ghost out at all in Shady's presence until Shady will happily eat on the chair. If you push these steps too far you will set back all you have achieved. I'm not one for letting them "sort it out" on their own. I would suggest you then progress from having Ghost in the carrier to being in a mosquito tent as letting him out is way too much for poor Shady just yet. Use lots of verbal praise when Ghost plays with you or when Shady eats calmly in Ghost's presence. When you get around to letting Ghost out, perhaps consider a harness whilst you play with him so at least you can control his launches at Shady. Our "oldies" need looking after

[xkappax]

This is all great advice, and I thank you all profusely. I'm going to try some of the things suggested, and most importantly, I'm going to make sure I take it slow this time. I'll post updates, and hopefully this story will have a happy ending! ^_^